The curse of the flightless bird, by Swiss Mister for his Miss(us)

Dear Candidate,

Thank you for your response and suggestion regarding the content of our rejection form letter.

We regret to inform you that on this occasion, your suggestion has been unsuccessful, as all CVs and email responses are scanned electronically for keywords and/or reviewed by HR drones with a preference to hire only those people who have been doing the exact same (or slightly more senior) roles for the past 5 years, rather than having an intelligent individual who is interested in growing our business and hiring people on the basis of demonstrated ability and potential, and, additionally, we are satisfied that our current form letter more closely matches our requirements to be jerks.

We realize this is short-term thinking on our part, however, we really only care about the top 1% of authors and jazzy celebrity cookbooks these days. We will keep your CV on file in case we are collectively hit by a bus or see your name repeatedly in the headlines as the new celebrity chef in the future.

Thank you for your continued stroking of our huge egos here at The Flightless Bird Company (UK).

With no regard for you,
The Flightless Bird HR-atron